Timmy Lai

I was dizzy; it was hard to concentrate. Deep worries swirled around in my head, and my health is transitioning from bad to worst. I tried to breath normally. I needed to concentrate, to find a way out of this nightmare and it has been very tired all weekend, dizzy and cold sweating. I still have that faint drumbeat in my chest calling me out for help. It sort of feels like I'm having muscle spasms in the ride side of my chest. It radiates through the bottom of my neck and around the shoulder area (where tension is heavily carried by most usually). The pressure on my chest is intolerable. So love, life, now health, meaning . . . over? I still can’t believe this bower bleeding thing happened to me. I know it happened, but I can’t believe it happened. I lay awake at night going over every detail of the process in my head. And then I saw it...the only thing scary enough to scare me after the experience I’d been through. Nevertheless, there is nothing that I will not brave for...

Of late, I've been trying to keep my room as clean as possible - so came this very day, as I was unloading some stuff from one of the boxes, I caught a glimpse of something that lay beneath the surface -- It’s the 'Engagement Ring'. " Ding Ding Ding" - I'm looking at it not knowing what to do. I'm still thinking whether to get rid of it. Naw! it’s just too beautiful. I’ll just gonna bury it deep in the back like I did with my feelings. Do you miss her? "Every day" You know, it’s weird - I haven’t shed a tear at all. Maybe you’re only allotted a certain amount of tears per man and I used mine up last time. Recently i got a good friend who tells me the same thing - " Yeah. I know how you feel ‘cause, my girlfriend broke up with me last year. And I miss her all the time " Suddenly, it dawned on me - there were two broken hearts in my-walk in. And it threw me so hard ‘cause, you know, I thought she's was the love of my life. Sh...